"Clam"ity

Why can’t all guys be like Bruno Mars, that is the golden question. I mean just read these lyrics..

Oh, her eyes, her eyes, make the stars look like they’re not shining. Her hair, her hair, falls perfectly without her trying. She’s so beautiful , and I tell her everyday.Yeah I know, I know when I compliment her she wont believe me And its so, its so sad to think she don’t see what I see But every time she asks me do I look okay I say When I see your face There’s not a thing that I would change Cause you’re amazing Just the way you are And when you smile,The whole world stops and stares for awhile Cause girl you’re amazing Just the way you are. Her lips, her lips I could kiss them all day if she’d let me Her laugh, her laugh She hates but I think its so sexy She’s so beautiful and I tell her everyday.

If any guy ever sang these lyrics to me, I would swoon over him and my heart would melt. Why can’t guys in real life be this adorable? Oh wait, cause they’re too busy messing with girls emotions. What ever gave them the power to control our every emotion in the first place ? We’re constantly waiting on their name to pop up in our text inbox, and when we want them to text us the most, it’s always somebody else’s name that appears. Whenever they’re in a bad mood, so are we because their mood suddenly controls ours. It’s proposterous , I tell you. Some say real men wear pink? I say real men talk about their emotions instead of playing this “game” cause frankly it’s stupid, and soon enough girls are gonna start catching on to the rules of the game. If they haven’t figured it out already, boys like the chase. And once that’s over, they’ll move on to a new chase. Well I’ve got news for you boys, two can play that game. Don’t hate the player, hate the game? Hmm no, i hate the player who made up the game. If there’s something you want to tell us, then here’s an idea.. TELL US. I had an experience once when a guy waited until 5 hours before I was getting on a flight for college all the way on the other side of the country to tell me his thoughts all along. Now what could that have done? Nothing. 5 snaps for you for waiting until the last possible second.

We’re not mind readers, that’s impossible. Because trust me, if the opportunity were there for any girl to get inside a guy’s mind for a day, she would seize that opportunity. Girls on the other hand are like open books. Once you get them talking about their feelings, they won’t stop talking about them. You would think that girls and guys are from two different planets. It just boggles my mind that girls wear their emotions on their sleeves while guys keep everything bottled up and don’t let you know what they feel. Is it an issue of their masculinity? Maybe. In my highschool, guys called other guys who treated their girlfriends nice “clams.” Really guys ? It’s called treating yo lady with respect. It’s such a “clam”ity to girls hearts and minds. So heres a quick p.s. to all the “clams” out there.. keep doing what you’re doing, that’s why you have a lady and the guys who made up the word clam are single and making up words like clam. I rest my case.